What Failure May Bring...

This week Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson recently posted his story about traveling to Canada at age 19 and playing less than a week of Pro Football before being cut.  August 2017, literally gazing out over a balcony in Vancouver, he can now in his life and dreams see that that failure was the greatest thing that never happened to him.  That path would have been unrecognizable to the one he stands in today.

Perhaps you can relate to recently experiencing a failure... 
and you are wondering what is going to happen next?

Author of Eat, Pray, Love Elizabeth Gilbert spoke on Lewis Howes' School of Greatness podcast about Jackhammers and Hummingbirds.  People who are Jackhammers are aligned completely in their purpose; they know exactly who they are, where they are going, and what they need to do.  This direction can carry them through most everything.

Yet people equally valuable but much quieter are Hummingbirds.  These individuals grace from person to person, gathering pollen from one and passing it to the next.  They are around for a fleeting moment of connection when a need exists, and then they follow a trail of pollen to the next flower.  Regretfully they are often perceived as weak or lost.

I believe every person has elements of each.

From Summer 2015 - Summer 2016 I was asked to be become a Master Trainer for a program I gave my all to for three years prior: Jackhammer focus!  I began extensively auditioning for this position.  What followed was a grueling process of my soul to think, emote, physically excel and embody every dance, every move, the brand... brand my all.

I met every goal, even exceeding it where I could.  When the process peaked June 2016 and myself and all the Master Trainers got together, and I felt totally lost.  Or perhaps... alone?
"Hammer out some Trainings!"  I heard.
I just... can't. 

So many things just aren't right...

When I trained to be everything I thought I wanted as a dance and fitness Master Trainer (a teacher of teachers) by July 2016, a downward spiral began that left many of us completely unsupported and unsuccessful by December 2016, and I had no elements of my Hummingbird senses to direct me.

I walked away from the Trainer role but never from teaching everyone else in my area.  Yet it was still internally ugly for me for the eight months of January-August 2017.  I couldn't wrap the words around my feelings and my intuition about the Trainer experience.

Until today.

The content was priceless, deep, and wide.  But so was I, and everything I learned before and have yet to learn.  I couldn't nail myself into one and only Jackhammer thing they needed for their program.

When I stepped away, I felt devastating grief and loss for all the times and people that were wonderful.  I ached over my years of dedication, the potential that could have been, the unknown path ahead, the separation from friends made and now distanced.

But my students glory in all I am from so many teachers combined, in addition to that program.  I must be free to always seek new content and meaning in service of my students.  Every dance and movement you embrace should have a meaning and purpose for YOU and your wellness, above all else.

The remaining Jackhammer Master Trainers had a precision focus that drives them onward, through all obstacles and any task.  The company will grow in their lights, and this gives me great peace.

Although I pray and work for a faster process of healing, the feelings of failure and separation are slowly easing.  After perceptions of failure, we must constantly remind ourselves...

We are NOT LESS because we fail in another's vision. 

Many people will experience the unpredictable process of occupational grief.  With a mix of freedom and sadness, perceived career loses can be the most dramatic moments of our lives.  I pray and work toward releasing all the sadness and mistakes and misdirection of that singular goal, and need it to ease to give my soul fully toward anything else.

My passions, my values, my social support and family love, a little moments of joy all help heal as I turn up my Hummingbird senses...  And when I teach a class openly and accessibly, bringing content in that YOU need, in service of each community,

THAT feels right.  

Hold on to good career memories
and keep faith among your perceived losses.

MORE is waiting for you 
that is yet to be realized. 

With love,